Dear Mattheew, I’m glad that you finally developed insight about relationships and love between men and have an understanding of your life and flaws and development. I shared this with a friend because I think he will learn a lot from your experience and wisdom. Thank you so much naomi shapiro.
I never thought something called a "substack" would ever make me tear up but here we are. That was beautiful. I continue to play the math game a bit with my relationships and I see how unhealthy that can be. Thanks for sharing your blood and bones so that I can grow through your experiences.
This is super corny, but I opened this essay in an empty courtyard in Key West before sunrise. It gave me all the feels. I was so hit by the honesty and beauty I hadn’t noticed it had changed from dark to light as I read the essay. The arrival of a new day reminded me I need to embrace love without keeping score and take the leap, knowing the net will appear.
Matthew, my brother, this was beautiful. My own writing mentor is in his 80s, and he's slowly going blind - terrifying for a writer who had typed his first published novel in Paris, next to, I shit you knot, Julio Cortazar. Two years ago I started going to see him once a week, every Saturday, for coffee and pastries. The other day I told him how much he meant to me; he went to the basement and fished out a copy of the Paris novel, still covered in coffee stains and gunk and the smells of cigarettes to keep.
I had trouble telling my Dad I loved him before he died, though I knew he knew. This lovely piece is an always-apropos reminder of why it's important to tell those we love that we do - though of course I suspect they know.
It sure is important. For us as much as them. Weekly coffee and pastries. What a gift. I think we build the cathedrals of our lives from such blocks of time. Thanks, A.D., for these good words.
It’s dark and windy and wet this AM on my island in the PNW. I stood out in the rain so my dog could pee. Then read your story. I’m going to post it on my frig. Thanks for this light. Much needed.
It is literally joyful for me, Matthew, to see your newsletter in my e-mail - and I eagerly await them. As I’ve mentioned before, I dearly hope you will write an autobiographical book; I’ll be among the first to purchase one! You make the world a better place.
Wow, Matthew I just love the way you weave a story. ♥️ I have noticed similar “tit for tat” tendencies from myself in early sobriety, and have only recently started opening up. I still struggle with this and have a lot more work to do. Thank you for sharing this - what a beautiful reminder that has arrived at the perfect time for me.
I understand the "tit for tat" with friends. You don't write me, I stop writing you. You don't call me, I stop calling you, etc etc etc. And then one day they're gone. And it's too late to reverse course. So I take it as a lesson to be learned for the friends who are still in my life. Don't repeat the same mistake I tell myself. I know the consequences.
Wow! What a story. I purposely waited until today to read this because you always give me so much to think about. Friendships are tricky, and at age 70 I realized I need to reach out more to my "real" friends. They always respond, and I realized they might often be "lonely" like I am. Because I am a spiritual person, I believe your friend knew how much you loved him and realized you were in the process of living your life. Thanks once again for giving us readers another glimpse into your life.
Dear Mattheew, I’m glad that you finally developed insight about relationships and love between men and have an understanding of your life and flaws and development. I shared this with a friend because I think he will learn a lot from your experience and wisdom. Thank you so much naomi shapiro.
Hope your friend gets something good from the read, Naomi. Thanks for the kind words.
I never thought something called a "substack" would ever make me tear up but here we are. That was beautiful. I continue to play the math game a bit with my relationships and I see how unhealthy that can be. Thanks for sharing your blood and bones so that I can grow through your experiences.
Thanks for being here with us, Kent. (I was never very good at math.)
This is super corny, but I opened this essay in an empty courtyard in Key West before sunrise. It gave me all the feels. I was so hit by the honesty and beauty I hadn’t noticed it had changed from dark to light as I read the essay. The arrival of a new day reminded me I need to embrace love without keeping score and take the leap, knowing the net will appear.
Really nice image, Heidi. Thanks for taking me to Key West this morning. So glad you connected.
I feel this so much. Glad to feel this morning 🌄.
It's good to feel. Thanks, Dixie.
What a delightful read, thank you.
When your name pops up in my email, I’m always eager to read what you’ve sent and without fail, I’m inspired. 😊
Happy 74th to Scott and 22nd to Greyson, my oldest son!
Happy Bday to Greyson. So glad you were inspired, Faith. Thanks for the kind words.
I really enjoyed the essay, Matt. I shared it on my Facebook page.
Thanks for spreading the word, Kris. So glad you enjoyed.
Matthew, my brother, this was beautiful. My own writing mentor is in his 80s, and he's slowly going blind - terrifying for a writer who had typed his first published novel in Paris, next to, I shit you knot, Julio Cortazar. Two years ago I started going to see him once a week, every Saturday, for coffee and pastries. The other day I told him how much he meant to me; he went to the basement and fished out a copy of the Paris novel, still covered in coffee stains and gunk and the smells of cigarettes to keep.
I had trouble telling my Dad I loved him before he died, though I knew he knew. This lovely piece is an always-apropos reminder of why it's important to tell those we love that we do - though of course I suspect they know.
It sure is important. For us as much as them. Weekly coffee and pastries. What a gift. I think we build the cathedrals of our lives from such blocks of time. Thanks, A.D., for these good words.
It’s dark and windy and wet this AM on my island in the PNW. I stood out in the rain so my dog could pee. Then read your story. I’m going to post it on my frig. Thanks for this light. Much needed.
Happy to make the fridge. Thanks for taking us to the PNW this morning. Glad the light found you, SB.
It is literally joyful for me, Matthew, to see your newsletter in my e-mail - and I eagerly await them. As I’ve mentioned before, I dearly hope you will write an autobiographical book; I’ll be among the first to purchase one! You make the world a better place.
Thanks, Roxanne. I will probably write a non-fiction book soon. I have some ideas. Glad TWBM brings you joy. Happy to hear it.
Wow, Matthew I just love the way you weave a story. ♥️ I have noticed similar “tit for tat” tendencies from myself in early sobriety, and have only recently started opening up. I still struggle with this and have a lot more work to do. Thank you for sharing this - what a beautiful reminder that has arrived at the perfect time for me.
Thanks for sharing your struggles, Amy. We are not alone if we don’t want to be. Good to connect here. GTA.
Agreed! And I so appreciate being a part of this community you have started here. ☺️
Had me in tears, this one. Very happy to see your healing journey through, and then out of, score keeping - been there (still go there sometimes).
You offer invaluable insight - building relationships out of the soul’s desire, instead of various insecurities. Thank you Matthew!
Learning to trust the soul. I think that just might be the thing. Thanks, Vicky.
Jesus. Thank you for writing this and for sharing it. I’m the better for it, in a raw and devastated and real kind of way.
Happy birthday to Scott and much love to the both of you. Thanks again.
Glad it hit for you, Emily. Thanks for the kind words. Much love right back at you.
I understand the "tit for tat" with friends. You don't write me, I stop writing you. You don't call me, I stop calling you, etc etc etc. And then one day they're gone. And it's too late to reverse course. So I take it as a lesson to be learned for the friends who are still in my life. Don't repeat the same mistake I tell myself. I know the consequences.
I appreciate your checking in here, Wallace. Good to have you with us.
Wow! What a story. I purposely waited until today to read this because you always give me so much to think about. Friendships are tricky, and at age 70 I realized I need to reach out more to my "real" friends. They always respond, and I realized they might often be "lonely" like I am. Because I am a spiritual person, I believe your friend knew how much you loved him and realized you were in the process of living your life. Thanks once again for giving us readers another glimpse into your life.
Thanks so much for these good words, Karen in South Carolina. Glad the read was worth the wait.